This could very well be both the happiest time of my life and the hardest. Mothering both boys is a balancing act that I never seem to master with each day. There are always frayed edges or undone parts, sometimes it feels a little like I’m managing to walk across an invisible tightrope with the baby in my arms, that’s how fragile my grip feels. But as I stared into the lake today, beyond the bubbling enthusiasm of the pool, Chas crawled before my eyes like a gorilla in pursuit of a transparent blue beach ball with white polka dots. When he had finished chasing the ball across the concrete, he hoisted himself onto his feet and began to clap and smile. Evidence that my job is, despite the aching heart, pretty precious. I mean, he could learn to do these things on his own, I know this, but the job of being there to see it all–how fortunate I am to always be witness to these little miracles.